No Love Lost Nor Gained

We seldomly pay attention to our personal needs as ladies while concerning ourselves with the needs of our mates. Let me first address the fact that you can't possibly make a man happy without possessing a form of happiness yourself. I mean, what exactly do they want? Freedom, comfort, security, support, and a woman that's willing to be anything he needs at that very moment. It's okay to take on the roles desired but at what cost if you're truly not interested or invested emotionally? Sometimes we pour out our very being not knowing we are draining ourselves in vain! What does it mean to pour out when you're not being replenished? The very things we want or feel we need to contribute can sometimes be detrimental, especially If not replenished to the point atleast Love is gained.

When I say detrimental; I mean you may need to re-evaluate your characteristics, trust, perception, reality and understanding. Let me tell you a story. At an early age a girl named Alex was exposed to older men. She was shown things far beyond what was needed to be known at 15. She was wined and dined; given what she thought was love and came to find her self as a major target of the men around her that secretly only had themselves in mind.  She was indeed a rookie in training and I don't mean training for a marathon. Within 2 years time, after numberous hotel rooms, parties and altercations with other women she had a solid dislike for 2 of the men she was constantly around. She realized love played no part in their relationship only a lust for destroying her innocense before time. She became pregnant by one and the other lingered. Her next step was to teach them a lesson. In that journey she admired them both while allowing them to play a part in her life at a distance and for what she learned she was greatful but she set out on a new path now with the traits of a beautiful Black Widow. And who knew the tables would turn 15 years later.

As she grew older she found herself dividing her very being amongst friend guys time wise to prevent what people like to call "putting your eggs in one basket." This enabled her to bounce back when trust was lost from one or when she felt wronged by another.  As she though,  it helped in many ways far beyond what she expected but it hurt her in other areas. She became a detached woman. Her children were not a result of a love filled relationship moreso a choice by way of physical traits of the male she chose. The funniest thing, all her children carried HER last name. Puzzling right?  It seems she had no intention of building anything long term rather a vision of what she felt her family should look like. This vision didn't include a man obviously....just her and her beautiful children. Not realizing she'd at some point have to face the rock band in full force. But at this point she'd gained no Love so she'd definitely not lost any.

What do you think happened?

( Stay tuned for the full story In the book "Pleasure Or Pain")